Life is over for you
Death is something you fixate on
It's an hourglass - for me it is
The sand atop is my love for you, strong and heavy and pulled by a deep natural observed peer-reviewed historical force such as gravity
It’s running out
The bottom sand…the bottom sand is me
It’s my future, my life, my hopes, dreams, desires
And I’m not the kind of person who leaps towards (gravitates to) the bottom sand, but
I don’t know what kind of life you’re living
I love you, but you are not present
I hate how high you get
And the horrible things you say
And you make fun of me
And treat me like I’m insane
Treat me like I am outlandish to request respect when all I have been doing is taking care of you
Making sure you’re comfortable
I can win no argument with you
How can you challenge emptiness?
Scream into a valley and hear the echo
Yes, the architecture of nature returns your call
But there isn’t anyone else there
As a child when you are told you can hear the ocean in a seashell
too good to be true
a concave shell bouncing off a concave baby ear
a sound created out of nothing, shapes, reverb
a sound like the ocean but just science
and this is how you look at life
At one point I convinced myself I didn’t care if you were with someone else
Psycho. I can’t even remember what that was like now. Now I am sick over it.
Now I am not confronting you. Now I am waiting, to catch you in the act.
Now I am sickened and deeply hurt and turning insane...
over what? Over nothingness?
Can nothing drive you insane?
Emptiness and sub space?
If a tree falls and no one is there does it make noise?
Were you already dead when I met you? Did I contribute to this?
I’m a fucking martyr.
I wait I swear I wait for something that will make me walk away. I really thought the fetus would have done this but you always have a story.
And I have before, almost walked away...
I’ve left the south
Cove Girl 